Ravin's Ramblings

I’ve said it before, but I really have been so very blessed. So many mothers have to work 40+ hrs a week. So many daughters don’t get to spend so much time with their family when their father is recovering from cancer. I have been so very lucky to have these extra moments and I owe this all to my husband. I knew when I started out on this adventure that it probably wouldn’t last. Such blessings don’t come without a price. I have been, for some time now, waiting for the other shoe to drop and a few weeks ago it did.

Without getting into the nitty-gritty, today I made the decision that my husband has probably been waiting six months for me to make. I told him to find us someplace nice to live in California. I hope and pray and take a leap of faith that we’re making the right decision…that things will be fine here at home while we go off and live our lives. I pray that things will be as they are now or better when we return in five years.

I’m over the tears now of looking at homes half the size of mine with gravel or concrete for back yards. I’ve even resigned myself to the fact that we may have to look at town homes or condos. That wouldn’t be so bad, a play park for the kid next to the swimming pool. I could live with that.

I have had one hell of a time creating beautiful memories these last six months. Drinking coffee with my friend Hiromi in San Francisco. Sipping on champagne and eating crepes for breakfast at my father-in-law’s in the Selkirks. Hiking with my mother up to the top of Sugar Loaf Mountain. Watching my father give my son his first tractor ride. Picking gladiolas with my family in the hot summer sun. Watching the children and the garden grow. I can’t wait to see what dreams will become memories. But for the love of God please let me have a back yard with grass!

(Zander's 1st tractor ride with Grandpa)

(relaxing on the porch swing after a day of canning)


(the home I'm reluctant to leave behind)


(the backyard extends past the swings to the garden shed)


(the living room)


(the nursery - 1 of 4 bedrooms)


(the kitchen)


(more of the kitchen)

Update: After I posted this, I went to bed. I opened the bible and prayed for guidance. The very first verse my fingers fell upon was this -

"Who are you, Lord?" Saul asked. "I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting," he replied. "Now get up and go into the city and you will be told what you must do." ~Acts 9(5:6)